Once you have survived any kind of abuse – but especially emotional abuse – it’s almost like you’re immunized.
Yes, until the immunization is complete, until your emotional immune system has recovered from the abuse, you’re more susceptible. This is true.
Once you’ve survived, once you’ve had the vitamins of supportive friends and loves, once you’ve had a chance to un-fuck your head and deconstruct the loops that your abuser trained you to follow… once that has happened, you react differently to abuse in the future.
Instead of the self-rationalizations and bullshit that abusers leverage in order to gain control of you, their attempts at manipulation create an emotional histamine response.
It is anger.
It is rage.
It is a deep unwillingness to be subject to that bullshit any longer.
I am writing this as millions of women worldwide are marching to protest a gaslighting abusive asshole president. I am writing this as millions more are having to deal with their smaller, personal episodes of gaslighting, self-eradication, of minimization and subjugation.
Whether in the personal or political realm, keep your immune system strong. Share your immunization. Call out the abusive tactics where and when you see them. Do so loudly, and without shame.
You are not the sickness.
You are the cure.