Welcome, folks, welcome.
This old thing? Yup, it’s a new year. Got it on sale, I did.
No, I think it’s still pretty good quality.
The old one? Yeah, it was okay. Some bad patches, some good patches – but it was, y’know? It was, in all its glorious wonderful awful splendorous despair. Or despairing splendor. Whichever.
Look, it’s gone. It’s over. And now there’s something new and shiny. That’s the way it goes. Don’t be upset that it’s gone.
It was an experience. Yours. Nobody else’s. Treasure it for that, not for how it measured up to anyone else’s.
Be glad that it happened.
Now, my friends, I think we’ve only got one thing to say to this new year.
Let’s start this thing up.