You don’t seem too happy to see me.

“You don’t seem too happy to see me.”

There are some phrases where tone of voice is everything.

This is one of them.

Admittedly it’s disconcerting when someone you care about doesn’t react the way you expect. Especially when you haven’t seen them for a while.

It’s possible to say this in a caring way.  If your loved one seems out of sorts, there’s probably a reason. Saying this in a caring tone gives you an opportunity to find out what’s wrong and to help.

The other way, though, is something completely different.  The other way is a demand for an emotional performance. It’s a demand borne out of a sense of entitlement.

And that sense of entitlement is a giant red flag.

It might seem that the difference between the two tones is obvious, but too often our caring natures makes us want to excuse the latter. 

Don’t.